You get what you want by playing according to the rules of reality.

But what are the rules of reality?

You may have a delusion or two regarding those rules.

We are born young and little… and the rules for the young and the little of any species are different than the rules for adults. But we humans didn’t get that the rules change… So we live as if the rules for infants and toddlers were still the rules for us, no matter how old we are. In our self-image, in our sense of self we are still young and little… About three years old, when the rules were changed on us.
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