Your physical brain and your IQ: can you get smarter?


Yesterday one of my long time students surprised me with sending me a ‘meme’ that had a quote from one of my articles.

No coincidences in the world… if you have a wide enough cone of vision you’ll know that.

We’ll explore the drama that is hidden in this sentence. Because there is drama, oftentimes tragedy there.
Sidenote: As I was looking for suitable images for this article, I was struck by the overwhelming confusion about intelligence, the brain’s role in it, meditation, and brain exercises. Most of what is written is horsh!t… truth value: 0%. 

1. So I’ll being with the word coincidence… coincidence means two things happen that are not connected… (a remarkable concurrence of events or circumstances without apparent causal connection.)

Someone is born on 9/11… the same day airplanes are flown into buildings… and people die. The two events are not connected.

Human nature looks for connections. Human nature is to look in the mind for connections. Not in reality, in the mind, where only the meanings live. None of the actual happenings live in the mind, only the story you made up about it.
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What does religious mean? And what does it have to do with not being happy, fulfilled, etc.


Will you choose the truth or the dogma? Love or “luv”? The personal cost of being religious…

I brought up the issue, my issue, my inability to be OK around religion.

Because I am so practiced activating my “Reticular Activator” and I am so committed to keep on expanding as a human being, my whole world shifted the moment I put my attention to the phenomenon.

All the books suddenly point to something that is related to my “object”, my dreams, articles, everything.

It is not in the foreground all the time, instead it is simmering on the back burner.

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Are you a taker?


Are you a taker?

Before I get to the question in the title, let’s look at a similar question: what is the difference between a judgment and an assessment?

The difference is subtle.

Judgment:
1. judgment is hiding that personal agenda: the speaker needs to be placed about the judged thing or person to be “authorized” to judge… “I have the right to judge, because I am better, smarter, because I-I-I-I-I whatever. Desire to receive for the self alone.
2. a judgment is always systemic. It uses two pronged concepts, good/bad, right/wrong, smart/stupid… systemic judgments.

Assessment:
an assessment is not building up the speaker’s self-estimation, it is observations about the observed, and mostly not concerned with the systemic (two-pronged aspect of anything), instead extrinsic or intrinsic aspects.

None of the judgment can be verified in reality, while much of the assessment is a part of reality: visible, trackable,

Now let’s return to the original question:

Is being a taker a judgment or an assessment?
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12 steps toward becoming truly who you are: the Playground program


The Playground program: the history
Back in 1988 when I first created the Playground: It is never too late to have a happy childhood, I’d just come out from participating in a 12-step program, similar to AA, but for people who suffered from the behavior of the alcoholic.

It turns out, that a troubled household with troubled parents creates the same symptoms as one with an alcoholic parent: a lack of safety. My parents weren’t alcoholic, but their behavior was erratic. One day I was beaten up for a behavior, the next it was ignored… Nerve wrecking. There was nothing I could count on to be quasi permanent and reliable. It’s a miracle that I didn’t withdraw into schizophrenia.
What’s good about 12-step programs?
Anyway, I liked the environment of a 12-step meeting: the meeting had principles, but it had no coaching, no rebuttal, no arguments, it was a very adult and equals program, as opposed to any other place in the world.

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Keep your enemies close… with friends like this who needs enemies?


I am reading all the books by Michael Connelly.

I had read about 20 before getting to the last few I have on my kindle… these books stirred up something in me…

Suddenly, in these last few books, there is an unexpected twist: the last three novels have a similar element, not quite there, or maybe even missing from the previous ones: a friend or colleague is turning against friend or colleague…

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Spiritual? Religious? Atheist?


It is undeniable that there is more to reality than what you can see with your eyes. The below the water level stuff… or behind the curtain type of stuff… mostly about the invisible dynamics, the invisible motive powers of people, and maybe even stuff.

I grew up atheist, a Marxist, and a seriously anti-religious child. Most of that wasn’t from my parents, I don’t ever remember them talking about any of that among themselves: they almost never talked to me about anything.

I never thought there were monsters under the bed, or that the Easter Bunny filled the boots in the windows (we are talking about Hungarian customs, don’t get confused!) or any other superstition. I was free to observe… unimpeded, unhindered, unguided by others’ imagination and fantasies, like religion.

I knew there were at least two layers to every human: what they showed and what was inside…

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I am personally offended… How can they do this to me?


I am personally offended… How can they do it to me? How dare it rain on my wedding day? How dare my husband lie to me? How dare my son pee in his bed?

What drives this thought process? Is it personal pride? Wrongful Pride? Ego? Self-importance? What is it?

If Ego is not what we were told it was, then where does “personally offended” come from?

I am sitting at my computer. It’s a beautiful day, Saturday. Suddenly a I hear a car horn urging someone to do something. Then again.

I feel the corners of my mouth curve down: I am personally offended. They are honking and it bothers me. They don’t behave the way they should: shut the f… up. Respect my peace and quiet.

Yesterday a plumber did some work in the downstairs apartment. He didn’t air out the pipes and it broke the my water filter when the air and water came rushing out in bursts instead of steadily flowing water, the way it SHOULD BE.

Personally offended.

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Why is a dog happy and you are not?


I bet the title of previous article, “Are you a taker” got instantly translated in your head to “Are you bad?”

What you don’t know is that if you are not allowed to take, you won’t be allowed to give… the ultimate stingy… If you are not allowed to live according to your nature, you will do cartwheels to avoid it… even if and even when your nature would take you where you want to go.

There is a major difference between you and your dog. Your dog is happy, and you are not.

It is worth looking into that, because all the psychology articles, all the books, and all the therapy sessions will be un-needed once you get what it is about you that makes you unhappy.
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What is the deepest, below the water level reason for your procrastination?


If you watched me long enough, you would probably swear that I am a procrastinator. I plan to do things, maybe I even write it down, maybe I even schedule it, and then I don’t do it for a long time, maybe ever.

I don’t consider myself a procrastinator: you need to have a should to be a procrastinator. By definition, procrastination is not doing what you should be doing. I have no shoulds, even if I said I would do something, it doesn’t live like a should for me.

I do things when I do them, and when I don’t do them, I look at them with curiosity, interested to see something about them, but that’s all. I am happy to do the things I do, even if I don’t particularly enjoy the activity, and never force myself to do something: when I do something, I do it because that is the thing to do because that is what I am doing. I never do anything I shouldn’t, I always do what I do.

I know I sound like I was dropped from Mars… sorry about that. But sometimes only outsiders can see things the insiders can’t see.

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Your childhood holds the keys to your redemption, to your happiness, to your success


Humans are the most vulnerable creatures of the Planet. They are not big enough, they are not strong enough, to protect themselves effectively from being harmed by predators or nature.

The only reason humans, as a species have survived so far is because of humans’ use of the brain to create protection from predators and the elements.

Nothing has changed: we, humans, are as vulnerable as every, but we have forgotten that the survival of the species depends on each individual in the species: it cannot be delegated to authorities, police, the medical establishment and the like. It has to happen on the individual level first and foremost.

We pretend not to know, because we really don’t care, that for a child to grow up healthy, the child needs a supportive environment with a sense of safety, including emotional safety.

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