Tag Archives: muscletest

It is the week of Thanksgiving… Why can’t you feel gratitude? Why your thanksgiving is hollow?

This morning I received an email from a young man who paid me to measure his starting point measurements.

He could be speaking for you.
I need to take better care to my physical body. Like you said, drinking more water is the first step.
I don’t take care of my body, and I can’t understand why.
I feel like I’m missing gratitude. I hate to say it but I don’t feel grateful, and I don’t understand why.
Gratitude probably will come up to everyone, at least in the United States, where this week is Thanksgiving week… and you are supposed to be grateful. Or pretend that you are.
The more lavish your Thanksgiving, the more money you spend, the more food on the table, the more you do it to cover up that you are pretending. And pretense is the killer of the spirit.

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…And I recoil from dirty laundry…

I should be doing some laundry. I have run out of socks… And anyways, I want to tame this beast of not doing my laundry.

I gather a load’s worth of stuff, carry it to the washing machine… and the distaste, the disgust is so strong… I take a beeline… and sit down by my computer.

Distaste, eh? Yeah, says muscle test. Disgust? yes. Was it always there? No. Was it from when i was 3? later… from age seven.

What was happening at age seven? I went to school. We had a live-in help: my mother was working on her Masters Degree, coming home around nine every night. My brother was about a year old… and was probably driving the live-in help bonkers.

And I recoil from dirty laundry…

I sit really quietly. The fear joins the distaste. I feel terror. I feel being beaten. Screamed at. Wrapped in wet sheets… Can’t breathe…

I must have wet my bed. I don’t remember. My body remembers. The fear, the disgust, the gagging.

The body remembers.

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Kabbalah String aka Red String

This blog (on Kabbalah) is new, and I decided to look for a logo image for it. A picture of a left wrist with the famous red string around it felt like an excellent idea.

So I went on Google and search for “Kabbalah String.” What a mistake. First off, there were 420 thousand pages listed. Intimidating. Second: most of those sites are hellbent at throwing dirt, venom, spit, at Kabbalah, and everything that has anything to do with Kabbalah. They call it a religion: it is not. They call it a cult: it is not.

I resisted being sucked into …

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