If you know you are stuck… stuck in a rut, stuck in a behavior, in a cycle, in a predictable outcome, or maybe you are stuck on a plateau… What you may want to consider that you need energy to move away from that place.
In this article I’ll show you two methods to create the energy to move.
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Life is like a spiral staircase… Every problem, every issue will come back to be addressed on a hopefully higher level… Issue like getting unstuck.
I once read a story about Gandhi. A woman came to him with his child. He asked Gandhi to tell the child that eating sugar is bad for him.
Gandhi listened, and then said: please come back in two weeks.
The woman and the child left… and supposedly traveled for days to get home, and then come back again.
They came in, and Gandhi simply said to the child: Don’t eat sugar. It’s bad for you.
The woman piped up: why couldn’t you say that a week ago?
Gandhi answered: Two weeks ago I myself was eating sugar…
This is the story that came up for me this morning.
I am in the middle of a two-day course I am taking (the recordings, of course). A course that teaches people about sales, and why people buy and why people don’t buy. Fascinating, insightful. Fantastic insights already…
I suddenly understand why I bought a course to learn how to put up virtual summits, and yet decided that I am not going to do it. It was an expensive course. Oy.
What I’ve gleaned I had been unfamiliar with.
The belief that I can’t do it, that if I tried to do it it would be a disaster.
There have been things before, things I bought but didn’t even try, but never before had I the clarity that a belief tells me that I can or can’t do.
Why did it come up now? Aren’t you curious?
For 70 odd years it didn’t come up, and suddenly it is there in all its ‘glory’… Why now?
And suddenly I saw: it came up like Gandhi’s sugar… Until I go through myself, it is inauthentic for me to teach it.
A few weeks ago I taught that if you look at life and everything in it as a process, you can get anywhere with enough desire to get there.
I said that as you go through a carefully crafted process, you reshape yourself and your beliefs…
One of my students who has never done anything in his life and that is how he knows himself promptly signed up to a program where I promise to teach that process…
He was really excited. Then. Then proceeded never to do the process. I think he didn’t hear it… I think maybe he already forgot that there is such a process.
If you want something, but you don’t do anything towards it, of course you won’t have it.
Do all courses, or most courses take you through a process to change who you are for yourself?
I don’t think so. And most people whose beliefs say they can’t do something, end up living their entire lives that way.
Now, back to Gandhi.
Gandhi didn’t feel right to tell a child to do something that he himself didn’t do. So he took two weeks to stop eating sweets and then he asked someone to do something that he had done himself: stop eating sugar.
I think my inner guidance threw up this belief, made it visible, so I can first have compassion for my student, and second go through the process of overcoming it, if I have big enough desire for what it would give
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The most important thing to know about procrastination is that it’s an avoidance tactic.
We all have it, it is a matter of degrees. Successful people, successful students avoid what they have to do, in this case doing their homework, less of the time. But just know: every time the idea of doing comes up: the idea of avoidance comes up too.
What is the difference between a student that chooses doing their homework and a student that chooses to do avoidance?
The difference is not so much in the moment, but in the students approach to life and studying in general.
Context is decisive, goes the saying. Context is the why of an activity.
Context answers the why would you do that? Why do you want it? To what end would you do it? What’s in it for you?
A good student has answered that question differently from the avoiding student.
A good student could have picked an goal, like getting educated, getting good grades to get into a good college, getting good grades to please my mother, learning to work my mind, etc. etc. etc.
A bad student considers learning useless, a waste of time, something that was imposed on them. They, potentially, consider liberty: doing what they want to do when they want to do it, and not doing what they don’t want to do… when they don’t want to do it, more important than freedom, what they ultimately crave. The freedom to be themselves.
Nietzsche, a famous German philosopher, called that behavior “infantile will to power”… which means, that when you do avoidance tactic, you are acting like a belligerent young child, maybe even a baby, crying for the bottle.
One of the most valued capacities for a human is maturity. Behaving and using your adult capacities… choosing, saying no, the ability to be with, and be effective in spite of negative emotions, pain, or bad thoughts.
And another invaluable capacity of an adult is to choose the context carefully, choose it to help them through the difficulties of dealing with unpleasant feelings, memories, and emotions, successfully, so they move forward in life.
The biological age of a person can be 70, but their behavior can alternate between 5 years old and 15 years old: I know, I have a client like that, lol.
Band-aid type solutions like the ones this following article teach are just that: band-aids.
As procrastination is part of being human, it is common to put off the tasks we are not fond of in order to do more pleasurable tasks.
Homework is one of the most common tasks that gets deferred. Although it seems impossible, it is possible to stop procrastinating homework assignments and have more time to spend doing more pleasant activities.
These simple steps can assist you in using your time more effectively.
First, ensure that you have a quiet, comfortable place to sit down and think. Ensuring that you have everything you need at hand to finish the task will eliminate unnecessary diversions.
Focusing on the task at hand without
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I have clients and students who have been in touch, buying stuff or courses since the beginning. That means about 10 years.
There is a certain kinship between us… they look out for me, they consider me, in addition to be their teacher, they consider me someone they want to be well, want to live long, want to succeed.
It is a very interesting experience for the teacher, because often the only thing that makes people listen is the authority the teacher has, by virtue of some achievement. So when they come to me with an idea to help me, I have to go through a process taming my ‘ego’ that wants to stay i the upper position. I ultimately manage to say: they are doing this because they love me… whether it is true or not, ego is willing to listen.
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In this article I talk about one of the ways you can get stuck… so this is a get unstuck article… I didn’t know when I started to write it.
You can get stuck in lots of ways, but getting unstuck is almost always to same: a process…
Once you read the actual case-study, mine, I’ll go into detail of the process of unstucking yourself… Now read it!
As you know, as part of keeping myself sharp and on the edge, I have taken on a project to sell products on Amazon.com.
I had a hunch that it will be a challenge, but I had no idea how difficult it was going to be.
So, here I am, in my third month of my challenge, and I got to a point where I am just sitting, and feel absolutely doomed.
