Tag Archives: Personality

Did Your Personality Get Put Together vs. You Were Born That Way?

I got a thank you note today. I get quite a few of those, I must admit.

They are a great way for me to track how the methodologies and principles I use in my teaching work. I mean, how effective I am, how effective the methods are. They track my ability to make a difference in the world. (Someone please remind me to write about how I view my making a difference… OK?)

This note reads
Today was a huge success. I did not even recognize myself. I was attempting to have a conversation with my sister when she became extremely aggressive upon trying to control me and failing. She was in my face yelling and pacing around in circles. I remained calm and did not attempt to defend myself as the lies flew at me. I was able to stick to the subject and not accuse. At this point her husband jumped in and tried to intimidate me, pointing his finger in my face and yelling. They both looked like mad men ganging up on me. I did not raise my voice or get emotional. This is the first time in my life I had no fear in a confrontational situation and it felt GREAT! To be honest I think it frightened my sister & her husband. They did not know what to think of me, I have had many weaknesses in the past but now I am strong.

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Who Were My Teachers in Transformation and Mindset… ?

Well, this could be a real long article, even a book.

I won’t go there! writing a book is way too long for my ADHD personality.

But there is one teacher, who I admire, Colin Wilson (of “Outsider” and “The Mind Parasite” fame, who wrote a book, “The Books In My Life” where he strung about 15 essays into a book, and I learned more from the writers he speaks of than I would have learned, had I read the original books.
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The straitjacket of your identity


The identity you invented is preventing you from living the life you want

What identity? you ask.

That person you deeply believe that you are. The good person, the helpful person, the nice person…

Or the superman
Or the intelligent, well spoken person
Or the smart person…
Or the humble person…

But there are questions, because those same identity traits are at the root of some of your complaints, so there is a disharmony somewhere.
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What makes you who you are today?

The obvious answers are that it is your past that makes you who you are. What happened to you. What was your education, your upbringing, your genes, your environment.

And all that seems to make you who you are today, and if you are anything like the people I deal with, day in and day out, you are not happy with who you are, how you are.

Why? How you are doesn’t get you the life you have always wanted, the accomplishments, the joy, the intimacy, the love, the care you wanted.

Is how you are really who you are? No, not at all. Nobody is. Or nobody is fully authentic.

You are is put together, while who you are is diligently covered up. Continue reading What makes you who you are today?